During a game, youth soccer players are focused on the game. They make split-second decisions about what they can do to help their team. However, their attention may be drawn to the parents yelling instructions or making a scene on the sideline. While parents may simply be doing this because they want the best for their child, the way that they behave can negatively affect all players' enjoyment of the game.
The truth is, how we as parents behave on the sidelines is often reflected in the way that our kids play on the field.
Here are six things to keep in mind when attending a soccer game...
1. Avoid ‘coaching’ from the sideline
It is natural for parents to want to shout instructions to players during a game. However, this causes a big problem that most parents don't realize. Kids are used to listening to their parents - or even the parents of a good friend. But on the field, their coach is "the boss". If a parent's instructions to the players conflicts with the instructions from the coach, then it can cause confusion for the player. Imagine if you were in a room full of people, trying to do your job, and having several people yelling different instructions at you. It will distract you from the task immediately at hand. It could cause confusion about what is the best option. It is anything but productive, right? By coaching from the sideline, parents are putting the players in this same situation.
Parents should understand that coaches have a strategy that covers the whole game, not just a single play. Coaches also know the whole team and how they play together. Coaches have a responsibility to build the team over the long-term. Sometimes that means sacrificing a game to teach players something that cannot be learned in practice. Trust the coach!
2. Do not criticize the referee
Referees are people and they do make mistakes. Even refs in professional sports (all of them) do make mistakes. As with all major sports, there will be calls that parents do not like. Sometimes, these do change the outcome of the game. These games are about the kids. When parents go after referees for what they perceive to be a mistake, it makes the game about the adults instead of the kids.
3. Focus on the benefits of the game rather than the score
These games are for recreational youth soccer. There will not be any scholarships given. College recruiters will not be scouting. This is where, especially at our younger ages, players learn the basics of the game and begin to build their skills. It's natural for everyone to want to win, but it's important to still focus on the larger picture. These kids should be learning the game and gaining enjoyment for the sport. Winning is nice, but it isn't everything.
4. Think when interacting with opposing fans
Fans will make comments. Sometimes those comments may provoke a reaction. Please keep in mind that you, as a fan, are representing Wellington Soccer Association and your own child! Please maintain the behavior that you would want your kids to have.
5. Don’t stress out over the game
Is your child having fun? Are they active? Enjoying the game? Again, there are no scholarships being given out. It's a youth soccer game, not the World Cup! Relax and keep perspective. If anything that happens at the game is the worst thing that happens to you today, hasn't it still been a pretty good day?
6. Save issues with the coach for the next day
There will likely be times when you disagree with a decision the coach makes. Maybe you are upset that your child didn't play more. Maybe you think they need to practice a specific skill. Whatever the case, right after the game is not the time to discuss it with the coach. After a game, emotions are often running high. There will not be anything that a coach can say that will make a parent feel better. The coach may even be thinking some of the same things that you are. It's best for everyone to go home, sleep on it, and talk the next day if you still feel it is needed.